Saturday, December 31, 2011

What I Learned in 2011

On this New Year's Eve I find myself reflecting on all the wonderful things I have learned this fine year.

1. I will never be part of the "Cool Mom Club" at the school and I'm actually okay with that. I'm proud of the fact that I like to bargain shop, that I drop the kids off at school and pick them up without putting makeup on (oh the horror). I talk about how my kids aren't perfect and how I'm not the perfect mom (double horror).

2. Turns out I am one crafty bitch and a damn fine cook. I've taught myself how to crochet, taken on a few home improvement projects/crafts and been baking and cooking up a storm. Sure my scarfs turn out a little lopsided and the hat I crocheted for Dylan ended up being way too big, but I did it. On the day I made my tree coat rack, I also baked banana bread and made meatloaf for dinner. Suck on that Martha Stewart.

3. After about 3 years of complete denial, I've accepted the fact I will never look like my children. I'm just not destined to be a blonde. I will happily remain a brunette from now on...dark ash brown to be exact. I've had to hear, "Oh they look nothing like you" for the last 5 plus years, guess I better get used to it.

4. Through the magical powers of You Tube I have taught myself how to do a lot of things (like dye my own hair, crochet a hat and a few other things). In fact I'm going to write my memoirs and I'm going to title them "Everything I Ever Needed to Know I Learned on You Tube." If I ever need to perform open heart surgery on an alligator you bet your ass I'm going to You Tube that first.

5. Being healthy and exercising isn't really all that bad. To be perfectly honest, this theory is only about a week in the making. I figured I'd start my resolution early this year. Amazingly enough I haven't died yet after running so that equals a win in my book.

6. I am completely and totally 100% obsessed with zombies.

7. Being an Aunt is so wonderful! I love my little nephew so much and I can't wait for the rest of my family to give me more babies! This woman has closed up her baby making shop for good.

8. The biggest shock for me was that I'm actually okay with not having any more kids. I mean come on, having another kid would probably push me completely into the pits of insanity. Although if Alexander Skarsgard ever offered, I'd open the shop right back up.

9. I used to vow up and down that, "I Will never get a Kindle. What's the point? You can't hold the book, keep it on your bookshelf, it's just not the same." Well I got a Kindle for my birthday this year (thanks Mom) and it changed my life. I admit here and now that I was WRONG! I love my Kindle and I can't imagine my life without it. I'm pretty sure Bryan is glad the book hording has ebbed, at least for the time being.

10. I have an identity other than Mrs. Jenni. I spent so much of my life as a teacher, I was afraid I wouldn't be able to stay home. That I wouldn't know what to do, I'd be bored or I'd scar my kids for life. Turns out, it's the best job I've ever had.

Happy New Year everyone. Bring on 2012 and the zombie apocalypse!


Alicia said...

Awesomely funny and heartfelt list, Jenni. Happy New Year, girl! I haven't even started my list of the newness and awesomeness of 2012. Guess I should get on that.

Hey! Thats me! said...

I just found your blog and it is hysterical. Thanks for a laugh.

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